The Property Inspection Checklist That Could Save Your Sanity (And Your Savings)
Picture this: You're at your 47th property inspection this month. The agent's spiel sounds like a greatest hits album on repeat. Everything's "deceptively spacious" and has "potential." You're starting to think "potential" is agent-speak for "prepare to remortgage."
Here's your no-nonsense guide to actually figuring out what you're buying, beyond the strategically placed orchids and suspiciously fresh paint.
Before You Even Leave the Car
Check the neighbours
Six cars on the lawn? That's a lifestyle choice that might affect yours
Pristine gardens all around? You might need to up your game
Construction sites nearby? Kiss your Saturday sleep-ins goodbye
The street test
Can you actually park?
Is it a rat run between major roads?
Would you feel safe walking here at night? (Test this theory at night, not during a sunny Saturday inspection)
The 60-Second External Reality Check
The roof isn't just a hat for your house
Sagging? That's expensive
Gutters looking like vertical gardens? Water damage incoming
Different colored tiles? Someone's done a dodgy repair
Cracks aren't character features
Hairline cracks: Normal, like grey hairs
Stepping cracks: The house is literally pulling apart
Cracks you can fit a coin in: Budget $10,000 minimum
Inside: Beyond the Vanilla Candles
The water test (do this, seriously)
Turn on ALL taps. Yes, the agent will look at you funny
Flush every toilet. Twice.
Check under sinks while water's running (rubber gloves optional but recommended)
Hot water taking forever? Factor in a new system
The floor detective work
Bounce test: If the floor bounces, the stumps are stuffed
Carpet corners: Lift them. We dare you
That strategic rug? It's hiding something. Always.
Windows and doors: The truth-tellers
Stuck windows aren't "vintage charm"
Doors that won't close properly = foundation issues or terrible DIY
Single glazing in Canberra = prepare for heating bills that'll make you weep
The Canberra-Specific Checks
Mr. Fluffy's ghost
If it was built in the 60s-70s, ASK about asbestos
Get it tested by professionals, not Dave from Facebook
The ACT has a register – use it
Energy rating reality
Anything under 5 stars will cost you more than your mortgage in winter
8+ stars means the previous owner actually cared
No rating? Budget for disappointment
The bushfire factor
Check the bushfire zone rating
Your insurance will thank you
Those beautiful gum trees? They're also fuel
The Questions Agents Hope You Won't Ask
"Can I see the building and pest inspection reports?" (In ACT, they have to have them)
"What's the strata's sinking fund looking like?" (For units – if it's empty, run)
"Why are the owners really selling?" (Then verify independently)
"Has this property been on the market before?" (Check old listings online)
"Can I come back for another inspection at a different time?" (Rush decisions are bad decisions)
Red Flags Bigger Than Parliament House
"Sold as is" = expensive problems ahead
Fresh paint in one random spot = water damage or worse
The agent won't let you inspect properly = definitely hiding something
"Renovator's dream" = prepare to live in a construction zone
More than five air fresheners = what died here?
The Tech-Savvy Inspection
Bring your phone and use it:
Compass app for orientation (north-facing actually matters here)
Torch for dark corners
Level app for floors
Voice recorder for notes (you'll forget everything after three properties)
Speed test the internet (NBN claims are often fiction)
The Second Inspection Non-Negotiables
Never buy without a second look where you:
Bring someone pessimistic
Visit during rain (water issues reveal themselves)
Check it out during peak hour
Actually time the commute to work
Talk to neighbors (they love to gossip about problems)
The Professional Backup
Yes, building inspections cost $600+. Yes, they're worth it. A good inspector will find $10,000 worth of problems the agent "forgot" to mention. That's a 1,500% return on investment.
The addy bottom line: In this market, you need to move fast, but not blindly. A systematic inspection approach means you can spot the duds quickly and confidently bid on the gems. And remember – if the agent gets annoyed at your thorough inspection, that tells you everything you need to know.